I recently read a blog post about what Jesus had to physically endure on the cross. While it wasn’t the most eloquent writing, it did provide details about the act of crucifixion and explained what the person being crucified experienced during the process. It ended with a comment along the lines of “Jesus endured all that so that you can go to heaven. Why can’t you bring yourself to serve Him?"
I hate arguments like this. I hate it when people talk about what Jesus did for us and then turn it around to guilt someone into becoming a Christian. I don’t like quid pro quo Christianity. I don’t like it because it’s not biblical. But more than that, I don’t like it because it’s not realistic.
“For our sake, he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God."
I think that most everyone would agree with me that we can’t repay God for our salvation. But I’ve heard preachers compare receiving the Holy Spirit to a paycheck for doing the work of “preparing yourself” to be saved. And I’m sure many folks have been told to “get themselves right” with God. But I don’t make myself right. I can’t make myself right. If I could “get myself right” with God, then I wouldn’t have needed Jesus on the cross.
We owe a huge debt to God. We do. All of us do. But if you fool yourself into thinking that you can somehow repay Him for what He paid at Calvary, you’re going down a path of misery, legalism, and spiritual torture. You most certainly didn’t deserve what Jesus did for you, but you can’t pay Him back, either. You owed a debt you could never pay, and Jesus paid it for you. Now, you’re free.
I posted today that Heidi and I were in the hospital due to some pregnancy-like symptoms. She is 32 weeks along with our second child. As most of you probably know, our son, Lincoln, was born at 34 weeks and spent nearly four weeks in NICU before he came home to us. Lincoln, of course, is perfect and brilliant and funny and precocious, so there is no problem with his having been premature. That said, we were hoping for a smoother final trimester this time around.
At any rate, here's the current status on Heidi and baby Gavin:
- For the past several weeks, Gavin has been very active, rolling and kicking inside her belly. Or so we thought. Now, it seems she's been experiencing at least some irregular mild to moderate contractions.
- As of this afternoon, Heidi is about 25% effaced. For those of you who understand these things, instead of 2.5 cm, she's about 1.7 cm. This sort of thing is a sort of pre-labor symptom, but is not the same as being in labor.
- A fetal fibronectin test was performed and came back negative, which means it's highly unlikely that she will go into labor within the next 7-10 days.
- Heidi was on IV fluids, but they've stopped that for now. She's been given some meds to help calm the contractions and steroids to accelerate Gavin's heart and lung development. There has been talk of giving her magnesium sulfate, but that hasn't happened yet.
- Heidi and I will be meeting with some doctors tomorrow from the NICU at the hospital, and I will have more details about what's coming then.
- Heidi will likely be in the hospital until Tuesday, and we will reconsider everything then.
A great big thanks to our amazing family for helping out with Lincoln, my pastor for coming by and praying with us, and my awesome neighbors for taking care of our furry kids at home. I'll keep everyone updated through the blog as news comes. Of course, by and large, this is a situation where no news is probably good news. We appreciate all of your prayers and kind words. Heidi is asleep, and she kicked me out of the hospital room because she didn't want to hear me snore.
We love you all.
UPDATE: January 17, 2015 - 16:46
We just spoke with the doctor, and, by and large, things are staying the same. On Tuesday, they will measure the length of her cervix again with her main obstetrician and the high-risk pregnancy team to see how things are going. Most likely, she's going to be on bed rest until 36 weeks, at which point she will be considered full term, and will have no restrictions.
Heidi is on a course of meds, as I mentioned before, to calm the contractions. Today, instead of frequent, irregular contractions she has been experiencing for the past several weeks, she's only had four or five. This is a great improvement. The course of medication will continue for every six hours for 48 hours, so this round will end on Sunday. If contractions continue, they will discuss other options.
Heidi has received one steroid injection; she will receive the second injection later today. Fortunately, she does a better job of dealing with injections than I do, and she hasn't run, passed out, or hit the nurse yet.
Again, thank you to everyone for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers. You mean so much to us both, and we appreciate the encouragement.
UPDATE: January 20, 2015 - 17:27
Heidi had another ultrasound today and everything is stable. We're being discharged! She'll complete her bed rest at home instead of the hospital and have weekly exams with the obstetrician.
Again, everyone, we appreciate your thoughts and prayers and kind words. You've helped make this stressful situation much more bearable. A special thanks to everyone who came to visit, to our parents for helping us out with Lincoln this weekend, and to Brad and Ashley for looking after me and taking care of Dizzy while I was otherwise occupied.
"Next I see the gluten-free section filled with crackers and bread made from various wheat-substitutes such as cardboard and sawdust. I skip this aisle because I'm not rich enough to have dietary restrictions."
This is some of the funniest, best writing I've read in a long time.
And I just use it on my beard.
John Pavlovitz writes about the Christian community's obsession with sin, particularly with defining sin and building boundaries. As Pavlovitz says, in his experience, people use the definition of sin (what behaviors or conditions qualify as "sin") as a way to define their tribe. People use sin as a "litmus test" to determine who's in and who's out. My favorite quote from this entry -
I’ve read the four gospels about a half a million times, and I have yet to see that from Jesus.
I'm not out to build an entire theology around Pavlovitz's writings here (though I do enjoy his writing and appreciate what he has to say), but this post today got me thinking.
Tolerable Sin and Intolerable Sin
I think that perhaps part of the problem with sin is that, as Christians, we define sin two ways - as tolerable or intolerable. Tolerable sin is "our" sin - the issues we struggle with. Of course, this differs for everyone: for some, it may be gossiping or lust or private porn use or lying or cutting corners on our taxes or even being short tempered with our spouse or our kids or our coworkers. None of these are good things to do, but they're not really that bad, and everyone has their own struggle, so we justify these little sins by saying that there are worse things we could do.
Intolerable sin, of course, is the sin of the "others" - drug abuse, perpetual drunkenness, child abuse, illicit sex, murder, armed robbery, or being a Democrat. These sins are, in our minds, just horrible, and people who engage in them simply can't be Christians because they are so heinous. No Christian would ever do such a thing.
"I am writing these things to you so that you may not sin."
I'm quoting, of course, from 1 John 2. It goes on to say "But if anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous. He is the propitiation for our sins, and not for ours only but also for the sins of the whole world."
I think that we assume that, by becoming a Christian, we cease to engage in the intolerable sins, and only dabble in the tolerable sins. When someone is converted, we expect them to give up the intolerable sins and join us in the liberty of tolerable sin, because, after all, they're not so bad.
John makes it clear - as does Jesus in the Gospels - that our goal isn't a certain tolerable level of minor sins. All sins are damnable, and God hates all sin. Sin is what separates us from God. Unrepentant sin - no matter how small or tolerable that sin is - disrupts our relationship with our Father and may even keep us from heaven.
We are to be without sin. How many of us can say that? How many of us, like the self-righteous, murderous throng of people surrounding the adulterous woman, consider the sins of the others far worse than our sins? It was only in response to Jesus pointing out their hypocrisy - let he among you who is without sin cast the first stone - that the crowd disperses. There are so many serious points that can be made from this story, but I only want to focus on one - casting judgment is serious business, and we must make sure that we're sinless before we do.
"But wait!" you say. "I'm not an adulterer, so I can judge adultery." (Or maybe you don't, but hear me out) Perhaps not. But Paul says that anyone who is guilty in any point of the law is guilty of the whole law. A gossip is no better than an adulterer, a murderer no worse than a petty criminal, in the eyes of God.
Where Sin Did Abound
So what, then? If we're all guilty of sin, what then? Do we just give up? Of course not. As John says, "If anyone does sin, we have an advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous." As Paul says, "Where sin increased, grace abounded all the more." (Romans 5:20). In chapter 6, Paul continues, "Are we to continue in sin that grace may abound? By no means!" (Romans 6:1-2)
This is a complicated idea - we know what sin is, and we're told not to sin. Yet every day, in so many ways, we do sin. Yet John, and Paul, and so many other authors, tell us that, in that event, grace covers that sin, and it is plentiful. But, we shouldn't be casual in sinning simply because we have grace. This tension is covered so well by Bonhoeffer in "The Cost of Discipleship" (if you haven't read it, you should). But my point is this - we ALL sin. All of us, from the pope down to the worst hypocrite. And we all need grace to cover our sins.
I've rambled far too long, and I'm sure many of you have dropped off by now. I can't blame you. But if you've gotten this far, thank you. And here is my conclusion - when we try to box people in by getting them to define what sins are tolerable and what sins are intolerable, we are totally blowing it as Christians. Jesus preferred the company of thieving tax collectors and professional whores to the religious elite. He didn't say they were better, and He didn't say they were worse.
In another blog, Pavlovitz talks about how his church has more gay youth than any other church he knows of. Affirming or no (I don't know, and that's not the point here), his church has created an environment in which those who are among the least likely to attend church have a place where they feel safe and can hear about Jesus. That's an amazing thing.
I know that there are some who will read this and say, "Look at Brad - he left the UPC and now he'll just accept any sort of sin because he doesn't know the truth anymore" or "he's just saying this to justify his own pet sins." Be careful. I've never said that, and I certainly don't believe that. But the Bible is clear: if you confess your sins and repent - no matter what the sins are! - Jesus is faithful and just to forgive you. I'm not perfect. You're not perfect. None of us are sinless. But when we confess and repent, our relationship with Jesus is restored.
The first responsibility of the church is to share the gospel - the sower going out to sow. The gospel is simple: "We're all sinners, and as such, we deserve to die. Jesus came, was greater than sin, and then took our punishment on Himself and died in our place. Through Him, we can have eternal life. There's nothing we do to earn it or deserve it - it is a gift bestowed on us by Jesus. He died in our place, and we are made righteous because of it." The only proper response to this is humility, not judgment, bickering, infighting, or division.
I don't know when this feature was added - I just noticed it last night when I was setting up my new iPhone 6 Plus.
You can have your iPhone send its last location to Apple when the battery is almost out of juice.
I've heard a ton of stories of people who left their phone somewhere but couldn't use Find My iPhone because the battery had died. This is a great (new?) feature.
Another great post from my friend Jayson Bradley.
Interesting article. I wonder what the numbers would look like if the iPhone 6 Plus wasn't so supply constrained.
Today at church, many in the band were on vacation, so we had an acoustic set. (I say “we”, though I am in no ways involved in the music, which is to everyone’s benefit.) One of the songs we sang was “Lord, I Need You” by Matt Maher. I had never heard the song before (which makes me running the lyrics on screen quite the adventure), and one line of the lyrics really caught my attention:
Holiness is Christ in me
As soon as I saw these lyrics, I scrambled for my journal and wrote them down. I’d never really thought of holiness this way: I grew up in a conservative Christian denomination in which holiness was functionally restricted to dress code and standards of appearance. Lip service was paid to the idea of inward holiness manifested in outward piety, but, anecdotally, outward standards WERE holiness. I’ve grown away from that, but I’ve never REALLY understood what holiness was.
Then, the text was from Mark 10, and we came to the story of the rich young ruler (vv. 17-23). He approaches Jesus and asks what he can do to inherit eternal life. Jesus answers by quoting the Ten Commandments, to which the ruler replies, “Teacher, all of these I’ve kept from my youth."
I can sort of imagine what this scene looked like. In my mind, this young ruler was handsome and a hotshot in Jerusalem. He was well-dressed and well-groomed, and he had a winning smile. He grew up rich, inherited his father’s money, and was probably a pretty good kid, the most popular of the group. When he ran up to Jesus, he wasn’t being entirely forthright; maybe he was curious what Jesus would say, but he probably went to talk to Him because it was just the cool thing to do. I imagine that when he ran to Jesus and knelt down, he did it in front of a big crowd because he wanted everyone to see him and realize just how awesome he really was. So when Jesus told him to keep the commandments, his response was “Done. What’s next?"
Of course, we know that he couldn’t really have done all these things. He couldn’t have perfectly kept the commandments his entire life. Surely at some point he lied, or wasn’t entirely fair in a business dealing, or lusted after a woman, or hated someone in his heart so much that he wanted to kill them. But even if he hadn’t done any of these things, he failed the most important commandment, which we see next.
After this young man told Jesus he’d kept the commandments his entire life, Jesus told him to sell everything he owned, give it to the poor, and become a disciple of Jesus. This, of course, proved to be too much for our rich young ruler. As the crowd stared, and this young man was faced with such an unrealistic commandment, he maybe stood up, indignant and angry, and stormed off. But I don’t think so. Maybe he was a little more earnest than he appears, and he was a little too proud of his piety, and when Jesus gave him that command - “sell ALL that you have” - our rich young friend realized one commandment that he hadn’t kept - “you shall not have any other gods above me.” There was a god in his life above God, and he chose, in that moment, which god he was serving.
So what does this story have to do with holiness? Well, to anyone watching from the outside, all of the measures of religion were met. This man was very pious - he was thorough in his worship and traditions, he gave in the offerings and sacrifices, he avoided the unsavory elements and kept his reputation intact. But at the heart of the matter, he was an idolater. He worshipped his possessions more than God. His outward actions had no effect on his inward condition - despite his religiousness, he wasn’t serving God.
Holiness is Christ in me. It isn’t in my hair length, or beard length, or whether you are tattooed or pierced or what you wear or what you eat or what you drink or what color your hair is. Holiness is Christ completing His perfect work in your heart, changing what you love and giving you a heart after His. And that’s what I want - true Holiness: Christ in me.
I can't decide if these tears are from laughing or crying.
I like Jayson Bradley. I like his last name. I’m not crazy about that fancy-schmancy spelling of his first name, though. Seems a little elitist. If you’ve got an “a” in there already, what do you need the “y” for? It’s too much, Ja(y)son.
But Jayson published a blog a few weeks ago that I’ve had saved because I wanted to respond to it. I liked it. It touched on some things I’ve long been thinking about, and even if I don’t agree with all of his conclusions, it’s some really great food for thought.
In his blog (linked above), Jayson lays out five problems he has with the idea of hell being an eternal, conscious torment, a doctrine which is largely sacrosanct in evangelical circles. Much like Jayson does in his blog, I’ll lay out a disclaimer - God likes questions and people who are curious and ponder about Him and His kingdom. Faith is trusting despite my struggles and questions, not blindly accepting whatever doctrine or theory or imaginative flight is delivered from behind the pulpit. Secondly, no one (at least not me) is denying that sin has consequences and can separate you from God. Neither am I arguing that sin doesn’t anger, upset, and hurt God. But these issues raised by Jayson echo thoughts that I’ve had, and I wanted to share them with you. Please, read his blog, and share your thoughts with him (and me!)
This was pretty incredible. It seemed to me to be channeling the soul of Calvin and Hobbes in a really cool way.
For the record, I'm the grinch in my family.
It’s alright to admit it to yourself, and to say it to someone else. In fact, doing so isn’t admitting defeat at all. It isn’t giving-up. It’s simply consenting, to fully feeling the reality of the despair and the pain of the moment.
As you do, just remember that you won’t feel like that forever.
John has quickly become one of my favorite bloggers. I won't lie, I got choked up reading this.
We may feign some generic concern others; content to fire off half-hearted prayers or cut-and-pasted Scripture sound bytes. We might invest the briefest moments to attend to another’s needs if we can do so without sacrificing too much time or convenience, but if we’re honest with ourselves, we so often see those who are different or in want or in crisis, not with compassion, but with contempt or perhaps worse; indifference.
I was especially touched by this. Click through to read the entire post.
This is just perfect. And it raises an excellent question - can I opt out of funding things the government does that I don't approve of?
For instance, I don't support America's excessive military action and broad military presence across the globe - can I have my money back? I don't support the war on drugs - do I get a tax deduction next April? As John Oliver says, it's not an a la carte type of thing - we all have to pay for all of government, whether we like it or not.
I particularly love this part about CEO pay:
"Going back to our earlier metric, that's 25 water bottles full of change—one minimum-wage worker's daily salary—per second of the workday."
Trickle down, indeed.